I have to admit - I don't usually pay attention to the "celebrity news" although from time to time I will scan it when I've run out of other things to read on the train in to work. I never have understood societies fascination with celebrities and the pedestals they put them on. I did the musician thing back in my teens/early 20s and had my groupies, and to be honest they were more annoying than anything. So maybe I'm just different.
But... this morning was one of those mornings and the first article was about how Amy Winehouse was getting ready to adopt a girl from St. Lucia. OK, I don't know what kind of mother she would have been, but if she was willing to adopt then more power to her. All children deserve a loving, stable home. But it wasn't the fact that she was going to adopt that caught my eye. It was that the girls dad was still alive (albeit in Germany) and had given permission for the adoption to proceed, being quoted something along the lines of "well it's ok with my mum so it's ok with me".
OK, so there are some things I will never understand. A parent not doing everything they can to keep their children being one of them. I know from personal experience how that can affect a child, and it's heartbreaking to watch them as they struggle to understand why "my mommy/daddy doesn't love me enough to be with me", which of course quickly turns into "I'm not good enough to be loved". My daughter has gone through that with her mother and it breaks my heart (although not nearly as much as it does hers). Certainly if you are in no position to care for your child, that's one thing. But even then you owe it to your child to explain it to them in an age-appropriate way so they don't take it all on internally.
Even if you can't care for your child, you can still pick up the phone. You can still write letters. You can still maintain a connection. You can keep their little heart from breaking over you.
So if you're estranged from your child, treat yourself and call them today if you can. If you can't, write them a letter. You'll feel better for it, and I can't begin to tell you what a difference such a simple act will make in their life.